Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Oh I just woke from the most horrible dream I have had in quite a while. I dreamed I began my first day of school this year and had nearly 30 children in my class. But they weren't the sweet 7 year olds I was expecting. Well they were 7 but they were all 4 and 5 feet tall! I tried to get the day started but was at a loss as to what to do so I started a movie on the active board and the next thing I knew the bell was ringing for the day to be over. I must have fallen asleep at my desk. The kids being new to the class hadn't MOVED. Not to go eat, not to go to the bathroom, nothing. Then the principal comes in, asks me if I got our first day stuff done, I tell her no while I am trying to stop the movie but instead multiple pop up windows keep showing up on the screen. Oh the noise level was atrocious! The kids were up trying to leave all at once, I didn't have any of their papers as to how they were suppose to get home, or all of the other papers I am suppose to get from them on the first day of school. So the principal is in total disbelief and very disappointed. I am feeling more overwhelmed than I nearly ever have. One little/big boy is doing the pee pee dance and saying he needs to go but doesn't know where, then a chorus of the rest of the class starts to do the same thing and complain because they haven't gotten to go or to eat and they are hungry. The next thing I know with all this STILL going on, the custodian brings in a large metal desk and places it in the front of the classroom and then just walks out. I step to my door while the after noon announcements are going on overhead, while my Principal is still talking to me with her visitors in tow, the kids are talking/screaming/crying I ask a teacher friend across the hall for some help and she just says to me, well you did volunteer for it and then asks me if I got the kids first day writing sample completed. I turn back into my doorway and there is this girl laying on the floor in a black adn white strawberry shortcake looking outfit, complete with the hat, dress, tights, etc. holding a black and white spiraled cane with a red strawberry on the end of it. She smiles up at me and says, "Hi, I'm your new co-teacher." My face must have reflected my dissappointment, anger, resentment, and all the other negative feelings I was having at that time because she said to me, "well you dont' have to hate me, it's not my fault, I was put her by your principal." It did however explain to me why I had 28-30 kids in the class but still! I just wanted to cry. Next thing I know the kids are pouring out the door, I am franctically trying to get their transportation papers and my principal is inspecting the old radiator behing my desk, pulling out old food containers, bags, etc. She blames me for putting the stuff in there but I absolutely never did it. Then I look away, am so ready to walk out and quit and then I wake up with this horrible feeling in the pit of my stomach! Sheesh, what a dream! Be glad those of you who have children, you only have 1 or 2 because as a teacher, I have yours plus about 20 others for 8 hours of the day. Don't get me wrong, I love my job, but then there are realistically days similar to this dream when I don't. I only hope this is a dream and not a reflection of what is to come for me next year :(
Friday, June 5, 2009
What is it about summer vacation that takes me back to childhood? Is it the mornings of sleeping in? Staying up late watching B movies? (Like Purple Rain) Eating PB&J sandwiches? I don't know but it is making me nostalgic for those '80's. Crazy like watching the smurfs. I have the urge to have an '80's sleep over to celebrate. I have fought and fought going back to that time. Every time an '80's song comes on the radio I yell for the station to be changed because I just didn't want to go back there. Why is it now that I don't mind revisiting it? Oh the memories are sometimes sweet but also painful. The awkwardness and embarrassment is mostly what comes to mind. I try to laugh but at the same time begin to cry.